He Slept..

I looked at his face.. while he slept..
tensed angles of his jaws were relaxed for a change..
his lips pouted a little.. just a little..
and trembled now and then...
his hair had fallen off their neat set up..
and a few brushed the middle of his brows..
his eyebrows twitched in his sleep..
just a few times..
but he looked peaceful for a change..
a little cold wind brushed his nose..
and he curled up tighter against the seat..
pulling his coat in.. searching for warmth..
My dear Lord... was this a test..?
how I had stopped myself.. only I knew..
I traced his temples..the small lines on his brow..
his closed eyelids.. his lashes..
his cold nose..
and his little gasps of warm breath escaping them...
his little pout.. the tiny dip in his chin..
nuzzled his neck.. with my eyes..
I dared not touch him..
for he would wake up..
and torture me with his cold silence..
he was quite in his sleep..
but he was not silent..
his breath kept me company..
I could gaze and gaze and he'd never know..
I could imagine his dreams for him..
and search for meanings of his lips trembling..
he'd never know..
I could breathe in his musk..
inhale as much as I want...
and he'd never know...
So I dared not touch him..
I dared not break his sweet rest...
I adored him in secret..
and in secret shall it stay..

1/2/2006 Bombay.

Written on a New Years Day!! I was entangled in an intense infatuation towards my then best buddy. I honestly don't know how he felt. He later said that he was babysitting me. I call him my Bastard.

All that is real. That really happened. In a three wheeler. On the way to a New Years Bash that went very bad later. Due to bad alcohol , bad music, and jealousy.